Saturday, June 22, 2013

5 months. Amazing

In doing rescue work, we all know we have our good days and our bad. Today was my "limit" for my bad. 
I already feel guilty about not making a post surgery post...which- by the way- is in it's own way- a GOOD thing- bc all is going well. It's crazy- I look back- and STILL wonder about how everything- even though we had our moments- was "perfect".  
Surgery day- my world stopped. That's all I could say...but it was a beautiful "dance" of incredible drs that are probably sick of me hugging/thanking them- and it went without a "hitch"--- so ONE more time (as if it'll be the last- haha) THANK YOU!! And also thank you to all who were there with me- tied to the updates...bc you and I were there together. I look back- and before I could even process an update-it was being posted for our family. We did it!!!  TOGETHER!!  
There was never a time in raising our little man that I ever felt anything to be hard. I am blessed that French Bulldog Rescue Network entrusted me with his care.  But now- there are times that I question "hard". I did my job- and I still do!  That- as a mom- will never stop.  What I never signed up for was the way this turned into a "social media craze".  Don't get me wrong...I'd never change that for the world either...but one thing I think is forgotten at times is the fact that it was never sought after.....I've done this work for yrs- "the world" didn't care...my friends did...and so did my neighborhood (who knew me)...but not the WORLD!   
I did what I did and I've always been happy doing it. I have the most amazing family within Chic Petique and Street Tails-- we are there for eachother- we step up where needed and we make it thru....small business, debt and good friends is all I've ever known--and I'm lucky for that!  
I sit here writing...rambling...bc I needed to...and in the background "tiny dancer" is playing...my Madison's "song"- first thing I heard when she passed away....and oddly enough- the first song I heard when I got into my car when they took Lentil back into surgery (had to lv the hospital to get my brain in order).  Funny how life works...."tiny dancer" will always "haunt" me in the best way ever...it's a sign that our beloved babies never leave us....
I may have lost anyone who even attempts to read this- if so- I'm sorry...but if you're still going- please know that I truly love all of you. 
I am so grateful for everything. I feel as though all that I've worked for, has come together...in a way I could never have planned...but it's better than anything I could've ever asked for!
It made me so sad that it seems as if Facebook posts have been so critical that its taking the fun out of all of this. If you ask anyone that knows me- I have so much more to do than post updates on Facebook. I always think- "yikes- my bed sheets are exposed to the world!"  This is my private life...yet I've come to sharing my private my life with so many- that I now view as my family. So please know- I keep Lentil safe...as I do all of my animals...no need to criticize....we all have opinions- but I do and have done the very best that I can!  Does that make sense?!  Maybe so...but hopefully it does. We all have different ways of "living"-but we are all in this together...and through this one incredible pup- we can make a difference together! I've given my life to it. 
I don't want drama...I don't have time for it. I want to make a difference...and so I will continue to try...with the help of my friends and my amazing new found family!
And today...I (we) celebrate that our boy, Lentil, is 5 months old!!!!   Together- we have gone through so much!  He is here- he is thriving- and full speed ahead- we will do what we can to help animals and children--because- at the end of the day...if we can put a smile on a child's face...we've succeeded!  :). Love you guys...and love you Mom and Dad...I've given you guys (mom and dad) many "grand dogs"...I'm sorry there aren't grand kids involved...but Mom...what you've given to the countless children at Bright Beginnings is more than most can do in a lifetime.  YOU are what moves mountains.  I look at all of this- and honestly- if I can be even half of you and dad as Lentil's personal assistant- I can be happy.